Growing up as kids, we believed every little thing our parents told us especially, our mothers. We can officially say in some cases; they lied to us. But we cannot blame them, as adults we now see it was for our good and it was with no bad intention.
We can understand parenting can be hard. This is why parents usually say some stuff to keep us thinking and not bother them. African parents are gurus in lying to kids. We have to give it to them; they succeeded in deceiving us.
Below are ten ridiculous lies our parents told us as kids
- “If you sit close to a boy, you would get pregnant.”
Girls would so much relate to this. African parents find it had to give sexual education. To make them not bother much and still pass their message across, they gave their daughters their trademark lie, “don’t seat with a boy if not, you would get pregnant.”
- “Let me keep your money for you.”
As kids, we so much knew this was a lie. Our parents would insist on keeping money gifted to us. Do you know when we finally know it a lie? It when you request for the cash and our mothers would immediately have an answer, which is, “where do you think I got the money to buy your Christmas cloth” while some would say, “have you paid me for the food you have been eating in this house”.
- “I passed all my exams at school.”
I still wonder how brilliant our parents were. Fathers are so guilty. When you come home with poor results, parents would immediately say you did not take after their footsteps; some would go to the extreme to say they never failed, that they were always top in their class. They have to apologise for making us feel so bad to question our identity.
- “If you keep on eating the same thing, it would grow on your head.”
For kids that overeat, probably chewing gum, sweet, or biscuit as long as it a snack and not a proper meal parent would always scare kids with the, “if you keep eating this, it would grow on your head.”
- “Tell me the truth I will not flog you.”
When they say this, and you fall for this, you are doomed. I repeat, do not ever. They use this as a scheme to get you to talk, and before you know it, you are crying.
- “Satan has eaten it”
In other to imbibe the culture of cleanliness and health safety, parents often tell their kids not to eat food that falls on the floor. This suddenly gave kids the consciousness to never eat what falls on the ground. They go ahead to tell friends,” Don’t eat it, Satan as eating it.”
- “Go and wear your slippers so you will follow me.”
My kid sister was prey to this. If as a kid, you were found of always following your parents about, or you loved to travel with them. Parents seeing you crying would not want you to keep on crying, so they would immediately instruct you to go wear your sleepers. Out of excitement, we would run to get our sleepers. But to our surprise, when we come out wearing our slippers, we find out they have gone. How heartbreaking?
- “When visitors give you 500 naira note, and they give you 5 naira in 5 places.”
Our parents were so fond of this. When a visitor gives us 500 nairas, our parents would collect it and exchange it with lower domination like 5 nairas and give us about five pieces of it. They give us the impression that the 5naira notes are more than the single 500 naira note.
- “When you finish eating, I will give you meat.”
For kids like us that were not fond of finishing our foods but love meat, our mothers had a good trick on us. They cajole us to finish our foods to get a slice of extra meat. I bet it with you we surely did finish our foods, but end up not given any piece of meat.
- “If you come first, I will buy a bicycle for you.”
This is a big lie that we wouldn’t take for granted. Our parents would always initiate the idea of gifting you a bicycle and not do that. Most of the time they give blank cheque and say, “if you get “the first position” in class, I will buy you a bicycle.” This kept a lot of us on our toes. We made sure we got the first position, and if we didn’t, we would feel so sad. But we are yet to get the bicycle